etc info:
- past: subira was raised on the coast of kondensal. from very young she was prone to doing very strange things. her parents hoped these things would fade as she got older, but they only got worse with age. when her parents separated and she was deprived of her sibling's company in her preteens, subira began to withdraw into herself. throughout her teens, she relied less and less on other people for any kind of support, focusing on her energy to making sure those important to her were alright. several unrelated incidents happened in her later teens; after this, stress began to get to her more and more; the emotions she felt began to feel stronger and stronger and desicions were harder and harder to make. after a year of this stress-buildup -- as well as several years of hidden depression and self-loathing -- subira attempted suicide. she recovered, but through the traditions of kondensal, she was tattooed on her wrists. the first ring, closest to her hands, represents the first time she attempted suicide. the second, after she recovered again, she had symbols tattooed on her thighs and back -- nothingness was all she needed, she thought. her thought processes degenerated from time to time into rambling and incoherency, and she often felt dissassociated and depersonalized -- as if she was no one, as if the world wasn't actually real. there was a third time, in which a third ring was tattooed on her forearms. on the fourth, in which she left the country in order to succeed this time, it was believed that she was dead when, in actuality, she was just extremely close to death & in a coma. however, it was this time that she was found by noardish scientists, and subjected to the expiriments which resulted in the blanking out of her personality. though she didn't remember her life before, it was still, in perspective, a sort of death for her. with the brainwashing came a complete release from the emotions and memories and mental illness which had earlier plagued her.
at the moment, subira doesn't know much about herself, but that's ok, because she doesn't really care, either.
subira was one of a group of subjects in the experiment done by the government of noardol. she was found in a coma in a small city near the noardol/krovlandia border, and taken by the government, since her identity was unrecognizeable by anyone. she was taken late in the experiment timeline, and thusly did not get a thorough, complete psychological brainwashing -- although she did go through the physical portion of it, affording her immortality; and also went through the beginning stage of the psycholigical portion, which wiped any remnants of memory and emotion from her. the early termination of the program left her with an apathetic, amnesiac personality. also, since the assassinating program had not been integrated into her at that point in time, the scientists did not attempt to exterminate her. however, they were not able to rehabilitate her back into a regular personality and lifespan, either, because several of the more completed subjects [including horace, jaeger, and even rek] ended up killing the majority of the ones responsible and destroying a large part of the facility.
subira most likely ended up wandering out of the place before its destruction, into the forest nearby. she encountered birdsong, and also fish in the stream, both which fascinated her, especially since they were the first thing she had seen after the brain-cleaning – the first interesting thing on a blank slate. to her, then, both birds and fish became a bit special, and are probably the only thing she comes close to caring about.
subira spends a large amount of time sitting and looking, or sitting and listening. she has no true residence anywhere, and wanders the world at whim, very slowly. she takes in everything, and would be very full of unparalleled knowledge, if she didn't forget most of it.
she can end up avoiding people for an extremely long amount of time, but she doesn't necessarily dislike them. she'll hold conversation with anyone who initiates it, but most likely won't say much, since she likes listening better than speaking. subira also smokes heavily around people, a habit that sometimes becomes annoying, because she's the only one in the area who won't die/be injured from the toxin intake. her species also warped the effects of the healing/immortality portion of the experiment, so that she can go for lengths of time without even breathing, eating, or sleeping. [through this she's been able to sit on the bottom of lakes/rivers and experience things you and i never could.] it also allows her to have peircings [something that most of the other subjects couldn't because the peircings would heal over while the ring was in there and become annoying/painful.] subira is a being of the present. she cares not for the past, tending to forget it. she thinks not of the future, either, because in her assumption, she will experience everything anyway.
for a small part, she was worshipped by monks in a monastery as an incarnation of true nothingness, mostly because she was discovered in the woods not moving for months, then years, at a time.
-personality: subira is very quiet, though more of the 'strong silent type' than because of any psychological effect. at times, her instincts flare up and she does react in a way that is not normal for her, but this is rare, and she is usually not aware of it [and so rarely apologizes or acknowledges it].
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